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Thursday, May 26, 2011

Not The Book Kind...

Can you guess what organ this is, smarty-pants?
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Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Saving The World From Armageddon

This past weekend marked the beginning of my awesome-bad-ass-action-hero career. That's me with the guns and swords. I dropped them all at various points, many, many times. I'm sure Vin Diesel has the same problem off camera.
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Friday, May 20, 2011

Crap From a Sketch Book: The Contemplation Of Mary

Happy Rapture Day Eve! Something religious seemed appropriate, since tomarrow the world is ending and all.

I call this drawing "The Contemplation Of Mary". This is one of those drawings that when I showed my mother she gave me that look of shame and horror that she's prone to giving me when I do something blatently offensive.

So here's The Virgin Mary sitting on the toilet. I didn't draw it to be blatantly offensive. If that where the case I would have made her straining in a pulic bathroon with some glory-holes in the walls and a 'for a good time call' scribble behind her. I just thought the idea of The Virgin Mary doing her best thinking on the john like anyone else was humanizing somehow. I suppose the point, if there was one to be had, was that extrodinary people also do ordinary things. That's what I'm going with anyways. This is really just another prime example of me emptying crap outta my head for a laugh.

I was trying to go for that Early Christian Art look, where the proportions and color are a bit off, and everyone has that far off 'dreamin' 'bout God' look, but it looks more like a reject project from a high-school art class - what is up with her neck? Seriously. Bad artist. Bad.

The most fun for me were the detail thingies; the window behind her head acting as a halo, the snake bathroom mat at her feet, the angel tp holder. And you can be sure that's holy water in that bowl ;-)

See ya'll in hell!
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Thursday, May 19, 2011

Crap From a Sketch Book: Optimus Prime and Gandhi Have a Picnic

OP: Are you sure you don't want anything?

G: No really, dude, I'm fine.
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Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Adventures in Crock Potting

I love my crock pot. I love meat. Combine the two and good things happen. Cooking in a slow cooker always feels like an experiment to me.I pretty much just throw stuff in the pot and if it smells tasty, I consider it a success. The fact that I have to just leave it the hell alone for HOURS just kills me though. I just wanna see what it's Doing in there! I mean, I know it's not doing Anything... but I just wanna see! This is just one way in which I am still a small child. One that likes Dominican beer in her bottles.

So today I attempted pulled pork. Mixed up some spices, apple cider vinegar, ketchup, brown sugar, poured it over some pork shoulder. Four hours later the apartment smells fan-freaking-tastic, and the pork tastes totally bitchin'*. Success!

I also have organs strewn around the living room. Couple of female reproductive systems (or lady parts, as I call 'em) sitting in a row on my coffee table, waiting for me to sew some ovaries into fallopian tubes. There's also remnants of zombies laying around -teeth on the table, a face in a bag, specks of blood here and there.

Just the usual really.

*When I edited this post, I realized that I'd forgotten the words "and the pork" in this sentence. So it said "Four hours later the apartment smells fan-freaking-tastic, tastes totally bitchin'." I almost choked on my pork (heh) I was laughing so hard. In short, I have not eaten my apartment, but when i do I will need lots on ketchup.

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Crap From a Sketch Book: Moose Was Our Running When He Spotted the Beaver Children

As you can see, Mister Moose has dropped his wallet, and the beaver children are attempting to chase him down to return it. There's also a flower watering the lawn, a bee saying "I'm a bee!", and a shoe saying "I'm a shoe!"

I swear I am not retarded.
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Monday, May 16, 2011

Crap from a sketch book: Brrraaaiiinnnssssss

Mmmmm. The perfect snack after a zombie filled weekend. In between being terrifying and snacking on those unfortunate enough to be eaten, I've been crocheting organs, as per usual. I also have a few drawings planned, but very little time to actually draw. So in the meantime I'll be posting old crappy drawings that amuse me. You're welcome.
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Saturday, May 14, 2011

Alternative Lifestyle

So hey guys. I'm a zombie now. I hope you can all respect my new lifestyle choice.

But really, Josh and I are shooting a commercial for the next few weeks, and this is the test make up. More pics to come.

I'm also shooting for Vixens this month. I'm so ready to step back into the role of supervillian that I'm warming up by being as evil as possible for the next couple weeks. Actors call this 'method acting'. I call it an excuse to be a bitch for the rest of the month.

Annnnnd I'll be working on a while new project where I get to be a apocalyptic militia vigilante. I'm talkin the next big action hero here. More deets on that to come, but I promise total kick-assery.

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