An Optimistic Cynic - Etsy Shop

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Mother's Day Uterus Giveaway!

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Monday, April 2, 2012

"Unwinnable" is a Win

I spent my Saturday at Unwinnable Geek Flea III  in Kearny, NJ with Rob Longo, creator of Vixens of Virtue Vixens of Vice. Together we schlocked dvds of Season One and Season Two, as well as *new* totally awesome Vixens Lip Balm, by BalmBon.

Little does Rob know that if he had played his cards right, he could have paid me in lip balm for Season Three.

I also had little crocheted turtle shells, mushrooms, invincibility stars, golden snitches, C'thulhu hats, and a skull up for sale... all of which will be available in the shop by the end of the week. 

Here's some more handmade stuff by some awesome local artists. I did my best to gather as many business cards to credit as accuratly as possible but there are some pics I'm unable to match up to names. If you see something you recognize, please let me know and I'll add their name/link!

Light switch covers, magnats, by Tchotchke and Hutch.

 Vintage mini nesting suitcases and pendents made from vintage comics, by Red Delicious Things, Facebook: Red Delicious Things

Rockin' T-shirt designs by rLo ArtWork, Facebook: rLoArtWork. Angel bear needs wuv!

Tetris bracelet! Pearler Bead artwork by Drew Barba.

Adventure Time pendents by Sugee! She also had these amazing cosplay hats, Facebook: Sugee!

The redicoulously intricate stylings of artist Matt Crabe.

Lightboxes from you favorite films, by Melchee's Shadowbox Shop.

C'thulhus, your fav movie charactors, anthropmorophized animals and more, by the adorable Gia Grillo.

(I do believe these awesome revamped comic book bracelets are also by Melchee.)

Great music, tasty baked goods, fun for kids of all ages.

Also, this happened:

I don't actually know if he connected with the event in any way. I'd like to think he just showed up of his own accord dressed as Spongebob.

See you at the next one in September!

I heard from Stu Horvath, Unwinnable's headmaster/organizer extraordinaire. He had this to say about Spongebob;

"For the record, Sponge Bob was not affiliated with the event. He is just a local, crazy drunk. At Geek Flea 2, he showed up in a sweatsuit Captain America costume, complete with trashcan lid shield. Amazing."
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Monday, March 12, 2012

WTF Crafting: "Sunglasses"

I am not insentitive to the fact that there are many different levels of crafting. Not eveyone is capable of knitting, or crocheting. Not everyone can be a talented painter, leather tooler, scuplter, weaver, under water metal bender, or what have ya.

And that's okay, because glue was invented.

Below is an Etsy Treasury I put together useing the search term "sunglasses".

'Can't See A Thing' by AnOptimisticCynic

Lady Gaga/The Fame Insp...
Grey Horses Fantasy Sun...
EYE see you Sunglasses
Frosted Sunglasses with...
Swarovski Crystal Harem...
Boss sunglasses
Emmanuel Vaughn's Z...
Black & White Zombie Mu...
Bear Fight Sunglasses
Retro Sunglasses Pop Ar...
Adorable "Call Me&...
Psychedelic Bat Sunglas...
Unforgettable Bridal Su...
Pink Lady Gaga Rhinesto...
Freedom at Last Black n...

Some math I learned today:

Rhinestones + Glue + Sunglasses = OMG YOU LOOK JUST LIKE LADY GAGA

Horses + Glue + Sunglasses = YAY HORSE FANTASY

Feathers + Bird + Glue + Sunglasses = CONGRATS ON YOUR WEDDING

Zippers + Glue + Sunglasses = YOU ARE WEARING ZIPPERS ON YOUR FACE
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Friday, March 9, 2012

Shops to SQUEE over: sleepybowie

Last Chistmas, I wanted to give my sister a unique gift, encompassing her interests. Two of which happen to be Philip Seymour Hoffman, and humbolt squids.











I can't really recall how I found the shop sleepybowie, and that's probably because it blew my freaking mind.

These human-animal hybrids are melded by artist  Jessie Bowie. While Philip Squidmore Hoffman was a custom order, if you're looking for a velocirapter on a classic pin-up's body, he's your man. Need a special gift for a music fan? Check out  his Prince or Tom Waits.  
And who doesn't love Cookie Monster???

Artist statement: "I like to imagine where my paintings end up and it's exciting to think that someone was confused at a dinner party because of me. I think that's the essence of life. Confusing guests."

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Thursday, February 16, 2012

I'd Like To Give You My Sperm

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Monday, January 30, 2012


Custom order hat. She wanted, and I quote, "A floppy black hat with a giant, big-ass, pink flower. Like shockingly big."
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Monday, January 16, 2012

WTF Crafting: Awful Upcycled Clothing

Upcycled Clothing is Frankensteined bits and pieces of old clothing made into a new garment. Or "garment". There's a lot of really cool upcycled clothing out there to be had.

But sometimes this happens.

Shirtpants are sooooo hawt right now, you guys.

*rubs eyes*



I’ve never claimed to be some kind of fashion guru, but I’m pretty sure a hoodie is not pants.
I am about 97% sure that a hoodie is NOT pants. 

This is a great outfit for the adventurous cat lady trying to be left the hell alone at the supermarket, or for getting away with talking to yourself out loud at the movies.

 I'm... I'm just so confused.

Hey, where'd my shirt go? Oh, it's right on my shirt, with my shirts.

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